6 Steps to Taking the Perfect Bluetooth Douchebag Picture on an iPhone

by Brian on August 5, 2009

Aaahh! It made the picture taking sound!  RUN!

albertsons_bluetooth_blurry_douche

So there I am, headed towards the checkout in my local grocery store when what do I spot?  You guessed it, a bluetooth douchebag.

I readied my iPhone, put it in camera mode and put my finger on the “take picture” button without releasing it yet (just a little trick you might want to use).  That enabled me to hold it up to my ear like I was talking.

After picking my basket back up and heading towards the douchebag I turned the appropriate angle and just before I released my thumb…I realized that I didn’t have my phone’s sound turned off which caused me to turn quickly but it was too late, there was the loud shutter sound that my phone makes when taking a picture.

You’ll notice the douchebag has begun to slightly turn his head as he realized I was taking a picture of him (I don’t even want to know what went through his tattooed head).  So I quickly beelined it out of there and waited several minutes before checking out.

What really sucked is I spotted a lady in one of the aisles that had a bluetooth earpiece too but I was so too paranoid now, thinking that for some reason my phone would make that sound again even though I turned it back to vibrate.

Alas, I was a student tonight and am attempting to become the teacher to those who have struggled to take the perfect bluetooth douchebag iPhone picture.

Here are some tips:

  1. TURN YOUR PHONE TO VIBRATE!
  2. Have the iPhone ready in camera mode with your finger on the “take picture” button
  3. Pretend to be on your phone
  4. When at the appropriate angle, hold as still as possible
  5. Release the “take picture” button
  6. Submit your picture to BluetoothDouchebag.com

I hope you can learn from my mistakes and help bring these bluetooth douchebags to justice!

-James

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